Shadow Work: Release Self-Doubt

Ah, Spring. 

I'm back outside on my patio -- happily basking in the sun. Listening to the birds, breathing in fresh air -- winter is finally over! Kinda. 

(Ok, so tomorrow it may be rainy and cold but we take advantage of what we can get, right?!)

The energy of spring and renewal is huge right now. 

Warmer weather.

Spring break. 

Spring cleaning. 

So with that -- what needs to be swept away so we can step into the new bright energy of springtime?

What shadows can we confront so we can jump into a brighter future?

Here's a big one.

Self-doubt. 

Self-doubt can be a suuuper sneaky tricky little thing. 

Case in point: a new, awesome opportunity will show up. I'm excited and happy and ready to take a chance and all of a sudden...

Self-doubt creeps its way in. It slinks over everything. It feels like unease, settling on my skin, darkening my mood. 

It often shows up for me when I'm JUST about to do something new and then I find I'm about to talk myself out of it. 

Just when I'm feeling courageous -- BAM -- the worry hits. The anxiety. The panic. 

The "should I?"and the"what if it fails" and then "I can't do this, I'm not good enough/worthy enough/strong enough" and you start to spiral into these feelings of despair -- down down down the rabbit hole....

Wait a minute. We don't have to do this dance again. 

I tell myself to stop for a second and breathe. 

That's when you stop and confront that shadow element. 

That fear. 

I saw someone post this and it was so true -- an acronym for fear is:

F: False

E: Evidence

A: Appearing

R: Real 

To confront your shadow, ask it WHY you're feeling fear around making a new choice, a new decision? 

You'll often find that your brain is going back to OLD patterns, old stories you may have told yourself. And you'll find that what you're fearing -- isn't really REAL. 

It's made up, pretend. You're imaging a reality that hasn't proven itself. And that self-doubt you're feeling is only getting in your way. 

Self doubt can show up in a myriad of ways:

- not speaking up with ideas 

- feeling impostor syndrome

- feeling like a failure

- hearing that harsh inner critic voice of judgement (I've battled this big time and when she shows up I kick her out)

- procrastinating to make a decision 

- feeling stuck about where to go next

Here's the thing. You have the power. You always have a choice. You can make a NEW decision, a better path, one that serves you. 

And it can be tough, I know! You're often stepping into the unknown -- and you won't have the clarity, the assurance, that you're making the right choice. 

But that's where faith comes in. 

To trust yourself.

Trust your intuition, your inner knowing.

 

So what does trusting your intuition feel like, especially in the face of self-doubt?

I can only speak from personal experience -- but self-doubt to me always feels off. It feels uneasy. It feels like a telemarketer calling me trying to sell me something I don't want or need. 

It feels like a... pyramid scheme where you know something is just not right. 

Or an empty mall. (Ok those are just plain creepy but, you get the picture!)

When self-doubt steps in, it feels like a churning in my stomach, and it never feels good. 

Intuition on the other hand -- feels light. It feels supported, guided. 

And if it isn't crystal clear in the moment, it comes as that still, small voice when you're absolutely silent and you've gone within for a few minutes (meditation again) and suddenly everything becomes clear. 

Glennon Doyle calls it, "the knowing" -- and that's really what it is. You trust yourself to KNOW. It feels like inspiration, and it's guiding you to take action to what you know. It feels GOOD. 

So whenever you're facing a decision and feeling stuck -- instead of settling into the doubt in that moment, tune into your inner-knowing. 

And know when you release that resistance and hesitation, you're releasing that self-doubt, too. You're allowing yourself to move forward. To make a choice. 

Whenever the self-doubt shadows pop up -- try this: 

• Where have you succeeded? Validate yourself and how far you've come.
• Practice self-acceptance -- be courageous enough to love ALL of you.
• Get to know the real you. What do you want from life? How can you make that happen?
• Surround yourself with friends that truly lift you up and bring you joy. 
• Take a break and do something that makes you happy.  
• Try creating a gratitude journal -- that way when those shadows sneak in, you can open your journal for inspiration.
• Visualize the future (you are in control of your life). 

So this spring, step out of your own way. 

Step out of the old version of yourself -- who you were in the past. 

Step into the new reality that you can create for yourself.  

Please believe in you. I do! 

And when in doubt -- take a deep breath.

You got this.