New Year, New Intention

I have a confession to make. 

Ready?

Here's my secret: I haven't made a successful New Years resolution in years. 

Yup. Failed every time!

Me and my brother were asked to write them as kids and then read them out loud (I know) and I...kind of hated this exercise with a passion. 

Though I understand the meaning behind it, I just struggle with it.

Why?

Because I, probably like so many other people, forgot about this resolution about 2 weeks later.

Truth. 

And it's really, really hard to stick to a new habit when the weather is wet and cold and gross out. 

Right?!

(Let's blame the weather. That's how I feel about it anyway, haha.)

So this year, instead of making a list of grand resolutions to do things I probably will never wind up doing, I'm going to make one, single, intention.

Just one. 

That I'll write on a sticky note and keep on my desk as a daily reminder. 

I'll even share it with you at the end of this blog post. 

But why intention instead of resolution?

Gathering up my trusty online dictionary:

intention /ĭn-tĕn′shən/

noun

1. The action or fact of intending.
   "Are computers capable of intention?"
2. An aim that guides action; an objective.
   "My intention is to learn Russian."

resolution noun

1. The state or quality of being resolute; firm determination.
   "faced the situation with resolution."
2. A firm decision to do something.
   "made a resolution to get more exercise."
3. A course of action determined or decided on.
   "His resolution is to get up early."
4. The act of solving or explaining a problem or puzzle.
5. The resolving or concluding of a dispute or disagreement.
6. The part of a literary work in which the complications of the plot are resolved or simplified.

First, resolution had a LOT of definitions, while intention didn't -- so I follow the path of least resistance. :)

Second, resolution is all about the decision to do something different, intention is all about what comes FIRST. 

Before the decision. 

It's the aim that guides the action. Like an archer taking aim. 

I like the freedom that comes with this, to have a general aim and allow the decisions to follow this. 

And, I have found that overall -- living intentionally has worked marvelously for me. 

So you may be asking yourself -- ok, what does living intentionally mean? 

How do I do that?

One of my favorite ways is through a fun daily tactic I call -- lovingly, and emphatically, UNSUBSCRIBE. 

(Note to reader: to bring extra fun to this blog post, please join me in saying this word like Oprah would on her Favorite Things episode, in the same voice as -- YOU GET A CAR! YOU GET A CAR! YOU GET A CAAAAR!!!!!)

Are you now picturing me viscously deleting spam emails and unsubscribing from newsletters with abandon as I press delete over and over on my laptop while gleefully shouting "UNSUBSCRIBE"?!

Yup. That's part of it.

But it's more than that. 

It's an intention that -- if something doesn't resonate with me, with the core of my being, I remove it from my life. 

I let go of anything that isn't serving me with abandon (and flourish) like:

• Old apps I don't use on my phone or laptop
• Unread emails, mail, clutter, etc. 
• Old clothes and things that I don't wear or use anymore (if they are still good, I donate them)
• Old habits (like checking my email first thing in the morning...)
• Food that no longer sits well with me 
• Influencers that don't benefit me
• Other people's opinions of me
• The news, many TV shows, and even social media at times
• People, places, work connections that feel like an energy drain 

The world doesn't change, but you can. 

You can choose what content you consume.

You can find the content that inspires you, that builds you up, that motivates you to grow.

Anything that feels old or outworn to you or drains you of life -- let that shit goooooo!

Another thing to "unsubscribe" from...are the thoughts that resonate with fear. 

You know what thoughts I'm talking about. The ones that keep you up at night. 

The ones that tell you all the reasons why you can't do something. 

The ones that fill your brain with doubt.

These do not belong in the new year, my friend!

In case you need a reminder:

You are strong. You are capable. You are incredible.

Look at how far you've come this year.

I BELIEVE IN YOU. 

Anything that tells you otherwise --- ready? UNSUBSCRIBE. 

(Yay! You said it!)

However, here's the trick. This process is a little harder than deleting an email or donating old shoes.

You can't unsubscribe from a feeling, an emotion, until you honor it first. 

The awareness, the acknowledgement comes first.

You can't delete it until you honor it -- so you don't just sweep it under the rug. 

(Note to reader: I have tried this, it doesn't work, the emotion comes back with vengeance haha). 

And I get it. 

It is HARD.

It can be very painful. 

Sometimes you have an experience that teaches you how to truly FEEL.

It cracks you open to the core. 

And it honestly feels like dying in that moment, a little death, because a part of you is dying. 

What died, exactly? 

I believe, it was the part of you that stopped feeling.  

You can let that go, with love. And understanding. 

And you realize, with that little death, how much you’ve been numbing your feelings. 

We run away and hide from our emotions because we THINK we can’t face them. 

But emotion is simply energy in motion, it changes when you change. 

So when you’re cracked open to face the deepest parts of you, the pain, the grief, the shame, the anger, the betrayal, and you honor that... and hold it as you would hold a small child, you change it. 

You are that child, inside. 

Your love for yourself and your honoring of your emotion, allowing yourself to feel it, changes it.

Your love for yourself...that is the new choice. 

You acknowledge your unexpressed emotions in a way you may have never before in your life. 

Maybe you never had permission to express them as a child.

But now, you do.

And that’s really brave. 

It takes true courage to say - I’m not going to numb out and shove this away, I’m going to call it like it is. 

And right now, I feel… hopeless. 

Lost. Abandoned. Hurt. Overwhelmed. Disappointed. Rejected. Worried. 

I’m not blaming this on anyone else: I honor this emotion. I can say what it is that I feel and name it. 

Now that I feel it, I can release it with love. 

That’s how you change the pattern, is through the awareness of if. 

And sometimes, in order to fully release, to fully unsubscribe from an emotion -- you need a bit more support. 

You’ve heard the saying that — pain in your body alerts you to something that’s wrong, that needs attention. 

So... get curious about the source of the pain. 

There are a great many practices that do this, therapy is one. 

For me, I found several books that really, really helped me -- The Emotion Code and Letting Go are two of my favorites that helped me change my entire way of thinking. 

I have also found that breathwork, meditation, journaling, hypnosis, bodywork, energy healing and even plant medicine additions (in moderation and used with extreme care) can be influential in diagnosing the cause of the pain.

So it can be identified and released. With love. 

But this is the deep work. 

It's the true transformation. 

Because once you alchemize that old emotion and release it for good...

You are FREE.

And that truly, is the best, and most courageous effort of all. 

If you have done this work, I applaud you.

It may be the most challenging thing you do in your life, but it's also the bravest. 

And that transformation leads to more love within, and more love reflected back to you. 

So...with only days remaining of 2023, and 2024 approaching... 

You may be feeling a lot of things. 

Totally valid.

Sit with these feelings, and set an intention if you'd like. 

My intention? 

To continue to unsubscribe from anything that's draining my energy...

and to invest in being truly present in each moment. 

That's for me. How about you?

What is your intention for 2024?

Maybe it's...

Having more compassion -- for you, and for others. 

Maybe it's...

Taking a leap of faith, even when you're not fully confident.

Maybe it's...

Going within to see your own inner light. 

Maybe it's...

Giving yourself permission to not see and do it all, but to rest. 

Maybe it's ...

Saying how you really feel.

Or maybe it's...

Rediscovering pieces of your heart that you thought were missing...but were just hidden for a while. 

What are you calling in, just for you?

My intention for you, for all of the beautiful souls reading this... is that you live your life to the absolute fullest, honoring your dreams with abandon, and finding love in everything and everyone that you meet. 

A year of joy, peace, acknowledgment and fulfillment. 

I thank you, truly. 

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog, for your support of me and my work. 

From the bottom of my heart, I am grateful for you. 

And I see you. 

I respect you. 

Your work, your inner-work, your healing -- matters. 

You MATTER. 

And I am here to support you however I can. 

I am so proud of you. 

Keep going. 

Have a wonderful and happy New Year, my friend.

You got this!