The Shadow Hunter

I’ve been working on this topic for about month, because I wasn’t exactly sure how to express it.  Death, and loss, are never easy things to talk about -- so most people don't talk about them!  However, I’ve started to reframe the thought of “passing away” into a more...hopeful state.  Here’s my take: Einstein told us that everything in this universe is energy.   Even what is not considered to be energy comes from energy or is caused by energy. So if everything is energy, including love, then when someone (or even a pet) that we love dies, does that energy disappear?   Does that love just…vanish?   No. I believe it remains, and  — that you can still access it. Death is not the end, my friends.   This past spring my grandmother (who had suffered dementia for several years) began to experience more health issues. This did NOT in any way affect her spirit, and when I would come to visit, she’d always greet me with a huge smile and would know exactly who I was.   She always used to t

The title of the blog was inspired by a failed yoga session.   OK, maybe failure is a little harsh, we’ll go with…attempted. An attempted yoga session.   When it comes to working out, I’m all about HIIT workouts where I can push my body to the max for 20 minutes and then promptly move on to something else.   Or…a long walk outside where I can look around and absorb all the nature around me. When it comes to exercise for me, I like to be entertained.   Yoga always seemed a little…slow, and I needed something more attention-holding so I avoided it because I thought it “wasn’t for me”.   But lately I’ve been having some hip pain so I decided…ok. I’ll do a yoga flow. This should help. Maybe. Hopefully.   However, I’d forgotten something. I do not have a great history with yoga.   I remember taking a hot yoga class with one of my friends several years ago and the teacher came up to me and put her hand on my shoulder. She looked at me seriously and instructed me to, “relax". I laughed a

As we're dipping into fall in Wisconsin, there's increasingly more evidence of death and decay. Leaves falling, temperatures dropping, plants are moving into hibernation mode. Yet, I'm sitting outside in the sun, grateful for these last lovely days of lingering warmth. And finding myself ready to embrace what comes next. I'm actually not unhappy about the weather changing.  This is VERY new for me.  I used to absolutely despise fall. I HATED it. Dreaded it every. single. year.  I'm a creature of warm weather -- if I don't have to wear a sweater or a coat, I'm happy. I actually am one of those *crazy* people that loves 80-90 degrees. In sun. And humidity.  !!! I know.  But I'm learning to embrace the beauty in fall -- the leaves changing, the crisp air, a warm cup of coffee outside.  I've found that Fall is a lot like shadow work. What is shadow work? It's essentially when you confront the darkness within you...those parts of you that you don'

This question came to me after I had a wonderful conversation tonight with a dear friend.  If I were to be totally and honest with myself...was I really living for ME?  Or for other people? I guess several years ago I never would have even thought to ask myself this question.  For most of my life, I wore the term "people-pleaser" with a shrug and a smile, and I secretly loved it. A few years back someone wrote in one of my performance reviews at work (don't get me started on these) that I was "hard-wired to please". I remember reading this comment with an odd mix of disdain and satisfaction as I held the paper in front of my boss, who was beaming with pride as he delivered this news. I actually got a promotion that day.   At the time, this only caused a very, very small red flag to go up in my heart. The rest of me was like YES YAY EVERYONE LOVES ME I'M STILL EMPLOYED WHEW.  Shocker. In general, I liked making people happy, and and it made me happy that the

You all know that song, right? "Wake me up" by Avicii? So wake me up when it's all over When I'm wiser and I'm older All this time I was finding myself, and I Didn't know I was lost I had been hearing this song for years until it finally made sense to me.  What does waking up to find yourself really mean? And how do you figure out who you REALLY are?  Let me tell you a story.  I think the best stories always start with "once upon a time".  However, this isn't fairy tale, this is real life. And real life is messy.  So we'll start with this...once upon a MESSY time. I had a mid-life crisis. Or rather, I THOUGHT I had a mid-life crisis. I had a successful career in advertising, I had recently quit my job to travel the world and work remotely, and everything was falling into place. Accept, it wasn't. I was massively stressed trying to launch a freelance career, working 50-60 hours a week, surviving on espresso and tequila, and blending my sal